I dreamt of my sister last night. I don’t recall ever having her in my dreams. It was just an ordinary dream. We were in Taiwan, doing some shopping. But somehow, that dream woke me up. As soon as I woke up, I started missing her so much, and I felt this physical deep ache in my heart. It wasn’t pain in my chest, it was pain in my actual heart…
My sister and I have been soulmates and best friends since childhood. We grew especially close when we were both in high school, in South Africa. We each had our own bedrooms with the exact same setup – desk, chair and bed. We were so close that we decided to move both of our desks into one room, and our beds in another. This way, we can study together during the day, and fall asleep together at night.
We hardly ever fought. I think there was only one time when we had something close to being a physical altercation, in high school. Mom was getting ready for a banquet at our house that evening and my sister and I were helping out. I don’t remember what we were fighting about, but it got heated and my sister and I both reached out our arms to grab each other. We’re about the same physical strength, so none of us moved an inch. After about 5 seconds, we looked at each other and burst out laughing! We then started chatting and helping out again, as if nothing ever happened. That’s how fast we’re able to let go of our arguments.
We made a pact that whenever we get into an argument, it doesn’t matter whose fault it was, or whose fault we think it was, we will take turns in making the first move to make up. We kept to our word and always made up really quickly.
My sister told me that I was a little bully when I was small, because I am the baby in the family, so I always got things my way (by crying). When I was a toddler, I had my own adult-sized chair, and if anyone sat it, I would just start crying until they got off my chair. My sister said that she didn’t like me that much back then. However, as the years went by, she started realizing how kind and loving I am, so she made an effort to connect with me, and to accommodate my shortcomings.
I was really touched when she told me that. I always thought that we were just naturally close to each other. I didn’t know that she consciously made an effort to be close to me. After learning about that, I just grew to love her even more.
She hasn’t been well and her condition has deteriorated more in the past few years. My parents are getting old and I feel that one day I will have to go back to Taiwan to take care of them, and my sister. I still feel very uneasy about it since I left Taiwan when I was 3 years old, and I don’t have many happy memories of being there. I’m also not used to it being so congested, and humid (especially in summer). I’m still trying to conquer this obstacle I have of going back to Taiwan one day to be close to my family again. This is why I want to learn about online marketing, and be able to make money from it, because then I can earn an income without being limited by where I’m at, or by time zone differences.
I miss my sister so much. I love her so much.